Welcome to Denyse Whelan Writes Here.
It’s been ten days since I last published a post here.
I asked myself tonight why I had not posted any news, and the ‘sad and first answer’ was “nothing to say of any consequence.”
And the better and more compassionate one is this:
It’s helpful for me to write (and share) and I wanted to admit to what has been so hard on me in the past weeks and why today was essential to my long term mental health improvement.
My G.P. Appointment In Person.
Over the past 9 or so days I have been ‘held’ at home due to the chronic stressor of having Irritable Bowel Sydrome and that the condition itself exacerbates the stress/anxiety about it. “Catch 22”.
The G.P. is lovely and we have had helpful phone consultations over these ‘not great days’ but today’s appointment had to be face-to-face. It was an anxious me who left the house but I HAD to do it, and did.
It was for her to see me (and vice versa) and gets a fuller picture of how I was going since we last caught up in person.
It was well over a month and she was the one who had diagnosed me with Emotional Exhaustion/Burnout from the trauma over the past decade that’s been part of my life.
This post explains a bit more for new readers.
The appointment was long and worthwhile as I had already understood it was about making a Mental Health Care Plan (in Australia, this is subsidised by Medicare, with a doctor’s referral so less to pay) for me to see a Psychologist.
It was time we agreed for me to receive some new help for my on-going health issues which include the ‘dreaded’ I.B.S. but also to finally unpack the trauma that has been part of my life’s last decade relating to these and more:
leaving Sydney….family, friends and the familiar 2015-2016
getting a major oral cancer diagnosis 2016-2017
managing many, many stressful surgeries and treatments and long drives to and from Sydney 2017-2022
being part of my late father’s care and support system, especially once we returned to Sydney 2020-2024
and managing my grief after Dad’s death and life moving forward (much changed for some good reasons too) from early 2024.
But Wait, I Was Trying This On My Own.
And what a great job I did and do.
I am self-motivated, and self-sufficient
I know how to be mindful and meditate daily
I am doing a hypnotherapy program for I.B.S.
I keep gratitude diaries and use on-line C.B.T. tools
I go into nature each day
I play with art
BUT what I cannot be…I know this now…is my own therapist.
And so, on Wednesday I begin this with relief. I have not really ‘unpacked’ much I now know I need to…and so, I am hopeful that my brave and self-compassionate self is pleased with the journey starting.
Always Encouraging Myself Helps.
And I am getting lots of other ‘help’ from various writers and philosophers and enjoy checking out a few new things to me like Tarot Cards, and Soul Cards. I have a book in which I am keeping quotes that resonate. I have a few older day calendars and enjoy finding quotes I love. And that’s good hand and head art/craft to do too.
The main man, B,…and the one I have loved for over 55 years…is the most caring and kind (and patient) person and a better companion in this time I could not ask for.
Found this I made from 10 years ago..at Pearl Beach N.S.W. where I know I was longing to feel…this:
That’s my news.
It was a big day..for me, and week ahead.
I hope your week treats you well.
How are you going?
Take care,
Denyse. x
Hi, Denyse - I am glad that you have found a professional who you can speak to. You have incredible inner wisdom and strength. Wishing you peace and health.
Hi Denyse - so glad you're looking after yourself and your well-being. Sometimes writing less and changing that to speaking about it to a professional can be the beginning of moving out of the loop and into new territory and greater happiness. I hope you find your heart settling (and your health improving) as you work through the challenges and out the other side into a refreshed and resilient "you". xx